Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Special Valentine's Day "Who Wants to Get Cat-Pantsed?" Edition

EDIT, AND APOLOGY: In the original version of this post, out of frustration with this situation, and by no means due to inherent malicious intent, I revealed information about the girl in question which she considers private, and not appropriate for this forum. My frustration is no excuse for this, and I have since removed the private information. I apologize for any damage that revealing this information may have caused, or may cause in the future, and I hope that those who read this information, if they were to meet her, would be sympathetic to this matter, which she is in no way responsible for, and is in no way her fault, since she is, as this post has always held, a special, beautiful girl, and deserves to be treated as such.

I'm taking time out on this very special holiday to write an entire post on this blog that, rather than using the "r" word over and over again, until you wish it were something that humans weren't capable of doing, talks about some *gasp* feelings . . .

I was working on this pair of pajama pants as a thoughtful, hand-made gift for a girl that I thought (and still think, honestly) was a particuarly special, beautiful member of the species.

However, over the past couple of weeks, to make a really long story really short, it seems as if she is no longer interested in this sort of romantic gesture. So I didn't actually finish the pants, since as much as I would enjoy finishing the job from a practical standpoint, my heart is no longer fully in it. (Sad face.)

But that's where you come in! Because I am sure that lots of girls would appreciate this sort of Valentine's Day present, but are unlikely to get it, one lucky girl reading this blog could be the recipient of this quasi-failed show of affection!

So of course, you want to see the goods:

Front View:

Back View:

Drawstring Detail:

Applique Detail:

These pajama pants, modeled after the pajama pants that I got after finishing second in the 2011 6-Hour Pajama Run this past July in New York (link: http://tokenrunningblog.blogspot.com/2011/07/week-in-review-24-30-july-2011-and-6.html), are, as described by the previously-intended recipient who at one point wore them, "so comfortable," and, to paraphrase, "steal-able." They are a thin, yet warm, flannel-textured acrylic with all-over blue-and-yellow plaid pattern, and contrasting "atom red" stitching.

The waist is both elastic and contrasting red drawstring (unique, limited-edition yarn), and fits my 28-inch waist fairly comfortably. If your waist size is in the 26-28 inch range, they should fit just fine. If by some miracle of nature your waist is smaller than that, I can take the elastic in. (Sorry, no fat chicks.)

The butt features the letters "TKBI," cut from a cartoon-cat patterned cotton broadcloth, appliqued with contrasting "atom red" thread - or they will be, when they're finished.

"TKBI" stands for "Tiny Kitten Brand Industries," the clothing company which, for legal purposes, my cat Ash (aka "Tiny Kitten") owns. Here is a picture of Ash:

Ash Ninja Racecar, Professional Business Cat

As it turns out, that sort of applique work is labor-intensive, even on a sewing machine (which may partially justify the ridiculous cost of the "real" NFL jerseys), and in my emotionally weak state, I got tired and frustrated and quit. But for you, I'll finish the "KBI," which is well over 75% of the applique work - the "K" alone has 11 distinct stitch lines! And besides, who wants "Tiny" on Valentine's Day, anyway?

Also, the pants that these were modeled on had pockets, while these do not, but I am willing to sew pockets into these for you, maybe even made out of some sort of cat-themed fabric, if I have enough left.

So start the bidding with whatever you have - every manner of favor will be considered on an obscure, arbitrary, and highly subjective scale. Good luck!

(Okay, to be very real for a moment, and brief about this, the relevant point here is that the r-word - notice that I didn't say it - is cathartic, in a way that is comfortable and familiar to me, since I've done it so many times, under so many conditions. But range of expression relative to the r-word, and, for that matter, any creative pursuit, is inherently limited. Making clothes is another means of creative expression that, for reasons to be left unexplored right now, appeals to me. But being unfamiliar with the emotional aspects of this, and having it currently tied up in difficult emotions to begin with, makes this sort of creative expression difficult for me, but appealing nonetheless. So once I can finish these pants, I can move on to other things, but for the moment, they're just going to be a fuzzy little roadblock on the couch in my basement, the same way my cats are all the time when I try to do anything.)

And speaking of cats, happy birthday to Maddie Maverick Airplane and the late Relay Ricky Racecar. We still miss you, Relay. (Maddie, keep up the good work.)

The Maddie Cat, aka Madden (2012 Video Game), for different

Relay, aka "The Rao"

Alright, now I promise I'll stop seeming this sort of crazy, and go back to being the normal running kind of crazy. Enjoy the rest of your Valentine's Day!


  1. David, You're a Blast. Happy Valentine's Day!!!

  2. Maybe you should just give her the pants anyways.

    Happy Valentine's Day!

  3. I dunno, anonymous "blast" person, if female and sized appropriately for said pants, makes a good argument. :P

    But seriously, the originally-intended recipient isn't out of the running, and all of my heart wants her to be the winner. But I'm also objective and realistic when I have to be . . .

  4. I second Kim...you should give her the pants. We all make mistakes and sometimes these are bigger or more public then others. But hopefully she will understand and accept your apology and any hurt/discomfort/distress will diminish with time.

    These pants were meant for her and giving them to someone else might bring bad juju/karma to the new/unintended recipient.

  5. David, only you know in your heart if she deserves the pajamas or not. If she does, give them to her and work with her towards a common goal. If not, donate them to some worthy charity and move forward and spend more time with your cats :)
    See you on the trails!

  6. Actually, I like that donation to a charity idea . . . that might be the winner. Thanks, Jack! :)

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